Monday, July 13, 2009

I'm not worth

"day 15"
i'll remember today,
although it's a bad day for me....
but at least i know wat u wan^^
yea....
we get a chance to chat for awhile.....
but it ends up with the sad ending...T.T
u told me many things,
but those things are wat i dowan to see it.....
u really selfish yea....
but i know u still love me....
u forced urself to forget me......
but is ok,
at least i realised a lot of stuff today.....
i know if i disappear in ur life is the best way for u to cheer up ur life....
i knew it,
finally i get wat u wan.....
it seems like u started to lose feeling on me.....
but is ok,
i try to think positive.....
i'll try....
i was struggling to redeem our relationship,
but u reject...
is ok...
u told me is bcoz of "time"....
ok...
i listen to u^^
anywhere i still love u,
i'll welcome u bek to my side anytime^^
but....
but i know u wont,
haih...
is ok men....
i know if u stay wit me,
u'll vry suffer....
is ok,
mayb it's the time for me to quit^^
but i just cant forget u!!!
yup,
my tears...
my tears flowing down again & again....
i'm really weak rite?
everytime think bout u,
& my stupid tears sure cant stand for it to flowing down.....
haih...
tis means i really love u,
tat's it...
do u know how much tat i love u??
do u know how much tat i miss u???
but i realised all is worthless oled........
i'm not worth!!!
at 1st i really struggling to redeem back our relationship,
but now i slowly slowly move backward....
coz i know,
i realise,
i understand....
i cant force u to be wit me again,
coz "force" cant bring any good things.....
i shud let u go,
and now...
shit.....!!!!
stop it my tears!!!!
i really shud let u go now....
u wan find a bf???
ok....
just go ahead.......
do watever u like^^
but make sure find a good bf^^
oh yea....
u say u wan freedom.....
izzit u wan to clubbing all nite long???
drinks alcohol & drunk the whole nite?????
okok...
just go ahead,
coz these 2 stuff is wat i have avoid u to do when u still with me.....
but now it's over....
u are freedom now just like those birds....
u can fly here & there,
u can party like rock star,
party everyday, everynite, every seconds, every minutes, or every hours......
it's up to u lah^^
just do watever u like now^^
if u dowan listen to me,
i oso cant do anything,
i just trying to help u^^
last time i used to be ur "idol",
but now it's changed.....
vry fast just like a flash,
u got no feeling in me anymore....
just call me to becomes ur fren now.....
u still remember last time how u trying to court me??
& have a secret love on me for 1year++??
nvm....
is ok.....
i shud not blame u....
anywhere u did a lot of things bcoz of me,
& i really appreciate it....
seriously....
damn it,
my tears.....
u are the 1 who really touched me a lot....
i'll remember u forever,
u wont disappear in my heart....
u still the best!!!
u stil deserve the 1st in my heart....
i'll still welcome u bek to my side anytime,
but i know it wont happen again^^
i must try to think positive,
yup...
i still got to live my life....
u just nid oly few months to forget me,
but i think i nid 1year to forget u.....
seriously...
my life now is like meaningless....
i lose direction.....
but thx for the lesson today,
u taught me alot of stuff....
i have learned and realised a lot of things....
i know i cant give u any good stuff,
we cant be together like tat,
u have oled gone far,far away,
& i'll slowly leave too^^
i won't request any stuff from u again,
coz i'm not worth....
i'm not worth at all,
it's worthless...



......
I will love you with all my heart,
To have forever - never to part.
This is a promise engrained in me,
Take my hand and let it be.
I will go to the ends of the earth
if that is what you need,
Just say yes and let your soul take the lead.
This is a promise at the core of me,
Kiss my lips and let this be.
I will wipe your tears with no questions asked,
No more will your feelings be masked.
This is a promise I make to you,
Look into my eyes and follow through.
I will know how to hold you
just by the look in your eye,
I will never forget -
not even on the day that I die.
This is a promise of my passion for you,
smile at me and make it true.
I will support you even
when I cannot support myself anymore,
I will dig deeper and
find the hidden strength at my inner core.
This promise means I sacrifice all of me for you,
Understand this- and make our lives anew.
I will love you with everything so deep inside,
And to only you - this gift I shall confide.
This is a promise so incredibly real,
kiss me my love and you shall feel.

anywhere just ignore tis poem,
i just put for fun...
i'm started to hate "LOVE"....

"I'M NOT WORTH"
T.T

&
i'll end my blog soon...
mayb after 1/2days.....
the continuous blog will talk more bout u & me....
&
then "the endless story between john & CLOUD" will disappear forever^^
it's no longer exist in tis world....

" I'M NOT WORTH "
T.T